Life can be tricky.... Two days ago, I started knitting. As I look at what I'm doing, I can't figure out what it will be in the end. Both my mom and my brother have asked if I know what it will be....the answer remains "no." This project is a lot like life. My parents mold me, I mold myself in some areas, but we don't truly know what the end result will be. We all know what we want the end to look like, but we can't know until it comes to completion. And we don't even know when completion will take place. Do I stop being molded by my parents when I move out? Maybe when I get married or have kids? I don't think we ever stop being molded by our parents in some way, shape, or form.
This week, my family has been sifting plenty of dirt for a garden plot. Even though I have talked TO my parents at church and different things, I don't think I talked WITH them. This showed when I got home and found out about our trampoline being taken down for the very garden plot we've been working on. While, at first, I thought going through and sifting dirt was a waste of time, I now think back to a passage in Matthew where Jesus talks about the seed falling on different types of paths. He talks about the farmer scattering the seeds on shallow but rocky soil. Sure, the seeds sprouted but they soon died because they did not have deep roots. And seeds planted in fertile soil produced several times the crop.
I feel like this thought applies to my life tremendously. I tend to give up very easily because thorns poke at my side or the sun is too hot or I feel helpless. Some days I feel like the Prodigal Son who runs away with everything his father gives him and then comes back because he wastes it all and wants to be his father's servant. But his father takes him in and treats him as if he were lost and has been found. I feel like my parents love me and care about me and want me. But I also know that if I were to leave, I would never be abandoned and the love would never stop. I know they will always care about me and it just may take different forms. At this point in my life, I am not ready to leave my family. I don't know if I will ever truly be ready to leave, but I know that it won't be as if I will never see them again. There will be many times I will see them! And I look forward to those times. But for now, I will live in the present and accept with open arms what my life is right now. I am loved, I am wanted, I am cared for.
This is a lot for one day's post but I haven't put one up in so long that I wanted to post what I have been thinking about. God is an amazing, unfathomable God!!! I am truly blessed!
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